Since first hearing that my family lives in one of the areas set to be aerially sprayed by the California Department of Food And Agriculture in 2008, I have been cycling through so many unpleasant and difficult emotions. As I read the statements coming from the petition to stop the LBAM aerial spraying, it’s easy to recognize that thousands and thousands of Californians share my mental distress.
Our opponent in this crisis – the California Department of Agriculture – has been described as cold, deaf, uncaring, robotic, dismissive in response to the voiced concerns of the people of California and their local civic governments. I have seen the blank faces and heard the deafening silence that greets the entreaties of men and women, mothers and fathers, young people and elders. It’s a chilling experience, a reception with the power to dehumanize us. Few things are as painful or damaging in this life as turning to someone when you’re frightened and hurting and being met without compassion or basic consideration.
Because millions of Californians are being treated without regard for their value or humanity, are being given the message that their lives, their hopes, their dreams and their loved ones are of less worth to the State than the doings of an insect, I want to take a moment here to validate the many emotions I am seeing my neighbors experiencing and that I am experiencing myself.
Here are some of the psychological difficulties you may be having right now as a result of the impending aerial spraying of California.
Disillusionment
I am repeatedly hearing patriotic Americans state that they have just lost faith in our government. They can’t believe that the California or U.S. government would do this to us, its citizens. This can’t be happening here, people are saying. Entire outlooks and world views are being changed for people who are trying to cope with the reality that our own government would spray us against our stated will. You are not alone if you are feeling this way.
Feeling Attacked
Many Americans are calling this an attack on the people by the government. People are feeling threatened and endangered. The citizens of Santa Cruz and Monterey Counties who were sprayed in 2007 vividly depicted what it feels like to have airplanes flying at 500 ft. over their homes again and again, night after night, knowing that carcinogens were being dumped on them. Some, in fact, thought that perhaps an air raid siren would warn them when the planes were coming. In other words, people feel like they are the targets in a war. It is not wrong to feel this way if you find that you do.
Powerlessness
People who feel like they are being attacked are also experiencing a unique sense of powerlessness because the aggressor is our own government. There is no one to turn to for protection, and without becoming criminals, there is no way to defend one’s family and home from the actions of the government agency carrying out the spraying. Many adults are wrestling with severe feelings of powerlessness to protect their children, their elderly parents and themselves from exposure to aerial toxins. It is understandable if you find yourself feeling frustrated and powerless.
Depression
Because we are Americans, we have been raised to believe that we are a free people, as stated in our Constitution, with the right to pursue and obtain safety and happiness. We attempt to organize our lives in the best way we can, in the belief that we will have clean air to breathe and non-toxic water and food to sustain us. Because these basic rights are being taken away by a government agency, our view of life and its meaning may also be changing drastically. This may cause Californians to become depressed about the prospect of the future. You may find yourself wondering what the point is of finishing school, working for a raise, raising a family, pursuing a special vocation or any of the normal activities of modern life because of the public health hazard being created by the CDFA. Many Californians already live in great fear of cancers which have become so prevalent in our society. That CDFA is knowingly increasing the toxicity of our environment is certainly depressing and may dim citizens’ hopes for healthy futures. You aren’t alone if you are feeling depressed.
Fear, Terror
The American people are still reeling emotionally from the violation of the 9-11 attacks. Our feelings of safety were robbed from us overnight by this act of unpardonable violence. One of the things that is wounding me most about the actions of our government is that it would subject us to the specter of airplanes flying over cities against the will of the people. Rather than attempting to help us recover our feelings of safety, the government is terrifying the people of California in a manner that is, to me, terribly reminiscent of the horrors that happened in New York. Our government should be doing everything it can in this decade to help us regain our confidence. Instead, millions of Californians are being put in a situation of terror. You are not wrong not to want to feel terrorized. It is not at all strange if you are feeling anxious, panicked or frightened right now.
Angry and Violent Feelings
Beneath the civil words and entreaties being raised to the California Department of Food and Agriculture, there is a terrible and dark anger. The people of the Monterey Bay region were absolutely outraged that their concerns and then their illnesses were dismissed. It is very normal that humans feel angry when others refuse to recognize their rights. Throughout history, people have gone to tremendous lengths to protect themselves and their loved ones from others who violate the human need for safety, and it is very understandable if you are discovering you feel terribly angry that the government is causing you or your family harm.
I am, however, extremely worried about the fact that anger often leads to violence. I am particularly concerned about regions of the Bay Area which already suffer from epidemic violence and have encountered craigslist postings threatening criminal acts of violence against the airplanes that will be flying over places like Oakland and San Francisco. This must not happen. People making such threats should think their way through to the outcomes of such activities. For example, if someone chose to shoot down a plane over Oakland, the plane would likely crash into the city, killing untold numbers of innocent people. Violence is never the answer.
That being said, righteous feelings of anger against injustice are a positive thing and can be utilized to energize societies who need to struggle for justice. Mahatma Gandhi managed to win freedom for India from unjust oppressors and Martin Luther King Jr. won civil rights for African Americans – and they did it with non-violent, non-cooperation. This is the route that civilized people must follow if they want good outcomes. Any other route simply plays into the very wrongdoing people are trying to fight when they stand up to injustice. So, while it is perfectly right for you to feel angry when you perceive that you are being abused, it is vital that you use that legitimate anger to fuel positive, non-violent action, not brute violence.
Because domestic violence is such a scourge in this country, I want to be sure to add to this that if you feel your anger getting out of control, do the responsible thing and seek counseling for anger management. Very often, when we are feeling rage, we may be tempted to take it out on the nearest person. Keep it firmly in mind that your spouse, your children, your loved ones are also likely feeling upset right now and the last thing they need is for you to turn on them in violence because you can’t seem to control your own anger. Now is the time to be treating everyone you care for with twice the consideration and love you normally do. We need to stick together and be kind to one another while we are in the midst of this crisis.
Feelings of Despair
We have all understood by now that, despite their valiant efforts, the people of Santa Cruz and Monterey counties were unable to stop the CDFA from subjecting them to aerial spraying of toxins. It may feel very hopeless to you right now that the SF Bay Area stands any better chance at stopping the spraying. Many have expressed the belief that even if we stop the CDFA, the USDA will appear on the scene and choose to spray us anyway. Feelings of depression, hopelessness and powerlessness may escalate into a very strong sense of despair. I would urge you to try to believe that if you dedicate yourself and your time to fighting this, there is still hope that we can stop it, but if you find yourself slipping into heavy despair and beginning to experience suicidal thoughts, please, get help. Contact a suicide hotline: 1-800-SUICIDE or 1-800-784-2433 so that you can speak to someone about what you are going through. I would add, please hang in there. We need you in this battle for justice. We need every single one of you.
Stress from enforced life changes
Many Californians will determine to change their lives because of the spraying. For example, many citizens have had to leave their homes in Central California. This has meant losing properties, jobs, friends, support systems and so much else that they hold dear. Life changes of this kind can be extremely stressful, even if they result in better safety or health. It is not at all odd that people who feel forced to evacuate will be experiencing many difficult emotions.
Feeling Confused, Trapped, Bewildered
Many of us do not know what we should do at this point, and are hanging in there to see if the 5 Bills and 1 measure being presented will be adopted to protect us from the spraying. Our lives may feel like they are in limbo right now. For many others, even if the spray is not halted, there is no possibility of fleeing to safety due to living arrangements, disabilities, financial concerns or other factors. What I find myself personally struggling with is that there doesn’t seem to be anywhere to go. If I move to the Central Valley region, aerial spraying for agriculture would be a part of daily life because of the conventional food belt there. If I move to the forested mountain regions of the state, the government departments will constantly be spraying toxins on the wild lands. I know I won’t be safe anywhere on the coast, because of the ever-growing coastal spray zone. Basically, there is no place in the state for me to refugee to, so far as my research indicates and I’m feeling very, very trapped. My family is in a state of confusion and disorder because of the actions of the government and I so resent this. We want this madness to stop so that we can go back to living our normal lives, but we find ourselves with no choice beyond waiting it out. We are feeling pretty bewildered right now and can certainly identify with you if you are, too.
These are the emotions I was able to think of off the top of my head and from speaking to others. It may be that you are having a different experience. Everyone is different. My goal in writing this has been to say that I hear you and that your life has value to me. I want to counteract the dehumanizing message and actions of the CDFA. We are worth so much more than they allow.
Please, I invite you to use the comments field of this post to share anything you are feeling right now. It can really help people to know that others are in the same boat and I want you to know how welcome you are here. I want you to feel you have a place to talk and to be taken seriously. You deserve no less.
7 users commented in " Psychological Stress Caused By LBAM Spraying – How Are You Doing? "
Follow-up comment rss or Leave a Trackbackthank your for your blog addressing the lbam issue. i have been exposed to checkmate in santa cruz and i am leaving family behind so as not to experience it again (despite a disability). it is traumatic. i spent all weekend in santa rosa where i used to live and wondered if the wine country spraying would be just as bad so thanks for addressing the fear that there is nowhere safe to go. plus who would want to move multiple times as they have found one moth in sonoma and they seem to be popping up everywhere. not enough attention has been paid to the human toll, the stress, the family dynamics now that this has become an obscenely large region to spray. i’m sure this article has made people feel less alone and validated and that is what we need. people are fighting this so hard and for us june is right around the corner. the panic is rising and that is when people don’t realize what the stress is doing to their health and relationships.
Dear Donna,
Thank you so much for sharing your personal experience with this.
Santa Rosa, at the moment, might not be the worst choice, but I would avoid any place in the Sonoma Valley (Kenwood, Glen Ellen, Sonoma, etc.) because spraying is a norm there due to the rampant alcohol industry which has pretty much wrecked that whole beautiful region.
The tough thing about this is that even some miles away…say in Santa Rosa…you have to deal with the fact that pesticide, sprayed on the ground or aerially, drifts. I recently read a study that says 50 miles of drift isn’t abnormal, so that means when Marin County is sprayed, if it isn’t stopped, Sonoma County will get it, too.
We need to stop the aerial spraying, and then we really need to take on the Conventional food industry as a whole. Because of modern growing practices, there is no state in the U.S. you can move to in order to be free of pesticides. The U.S. is responsible for a whopping 20% of the world’s pesticide use and it has ruined our soils and contaminated our water. If we want to save our lands for the use of future generations, and protect the human gene pool, we must go back to the wisdom of the ages of growing food in such a way that natural balances create a health agricultural environment.
The earlier civilizations of both North and South America sustained huge populations with completely organic farming. Biodiversity, not poison, is the key.
I am so sorry to hear for the extreme changes you’re having to make in your life, and I feel the anguish of having to leave your loved ones behind to protect yourself. This is a terrible price to pay for the profits of CDFA and Stuart Resnick of Suterra LLC. I wish you strength in this battle, and an eventual time of peace in your life, Donna.
Mim
I’m no farmer, but I’m thinking it’d help if we learned from organic farmers and sustainable farming practices, and brought this message to Sacramento, along with other ideas and statements against spray.
Dear Mim,
I live in Fremont and my daughter is attending UC Santa Cruz. Here physician has already told her to leave Santa Cruz because of the lbam spraying. She has asthma and allergies and this will make it her medical conditions worse once the spraying begins. Luckily, last fall, UC Santa Cruz’s upper campus, where she lives and attends classes, was not sprayed. So, she will be coming home right before the spraying begins and needing to attend college elsewhere. The City of Fremont is not currently scheduled to be sprayed.
Spraying pesticides over urban areas when there has been no scientific evidence to support or deny the potential short and/or long term human and environmental consequences breaks all moral, ethical, and legal boundaries to say the least. Our most vulnerable populations, which includes, pregnant women, nursing mothers, infants, children, elderly, medically vulnerable populations and the risk these pesticides could potentially have on them, as well as, even healthy people and our environment is a major concern. Over the decades, there have been so many scientific studies that demonstrates that pesticides do effect our health and environment both short and long term.
The United States Department of Agriculture just announced today that they will be looking for the light brown apple moth in every state and in Puerto Rico. This should have been determined before Monterey and Santa Cruz Counties were sprayed along with the health and environmental risk assessments to the pesticide chemicals being utilized.
The real problem is a trade issue. California’s light brown apple moth quarantined areas make it difficult for farmers and nurseries to trade outside the quarantined areas, which includes other states, Mexico, and Canada, which is where the true economic loss is to the agriculture businesses. The moth has caused no plant damage and is considered a minor pest in other countries.
This is all about agriculture’s profits over the safety of humans and the environment, which needs to change through legislation, lawsuits, and opposition.
Please continue to write and telephone California Governor “Terminator” and Senator Barbara Boxer who chairs the Environmental Quality Committee. Unfortunately, Senator Feinstein is on the Agriculture Committee.
Dear BPM,
Thank you so much for sharing your experience with this with all of us.
Your daughter’s doctor is, of course, quite right. I am so sorry that her college education has been so disrupted by this. Unbelievable! The consequences this has had for countless people in their daily lives are totaling up into the millions, I am sure, and it grieves me to think that your child’s education has become a casualty of the spraying.
Here is the trouble. As you’ve said, the USDA is now planning to look for this moth across the US. I’ve been afraid of this…afraid that aerial spraying in California was the beginning of a national spraying campaign. Not only does it make it nearly impossible to pick any place in the US to live where we would be safe from spraying, but it also makes it even more vital that we stop the spraying here – tell the government they are not permitted to spray human beings. Our country needs to stop right now on this horribly wrong path we’ve started down.
I really appreciate your clearheaded assessment of the financial motive behind the endangerment of human lives and the more people realize this, the more outrage there will be. I send very best wishes to you and your daughter for a time of peace to come back to your family.
Mim
Dear Mim,
My family and I were living in the Santa Cruz area during the spray last fall. I came down with a strange respiratory illness that wouldn’t heal through usual means (acupuncture, herbs). I had sneezing, and constant intense itching in my eyes and nose. I could tell that it was not a normal sort of allergic reaction. As soon as we moved away to Marin in January, I was fine.
Now we are being threatened with the same garbage here, and I have to say that I understand wanting to shoot planes out of the sky!
We just moved our entire lives and those of our children.The thought of having to leave Marin really infuriates me! Here’s the kicker, my husband works for the STATE and there is no way they will grant him a transfer because of the spray!
Hope to see you all at the march tomorrow!
Christine
Dear Christine,
I am terribly sorry to hear about what you are going through. I’m sure you felt like you had escaped to safety after such a nightmare…only to find you are not safe in Marin, either.
This is so unacceptable that any government would turn its own citizens into refugees, fleeing for their health, their lives, being chased across the state by airplanes raining poison on us all.
Your story makes me so angry and so determined that we must stop the CDFA in their immoral, terrifying plan. This should never have happened to your family in the first place, and it’s completely outrageous that it would happen again.
The bottom line is that, all across California, we are fighting for our lives, and though everyone I have spoken to is committed to doing this without violence, we do need a real plan to ensure that we are protected from this aggressive action of CDFAs. Perhaps it will be the city mayors that use their power to authorize the police to defend us from an aerial assault. We are in desperate need of protection from CDFA, and I really hope we get it so that your family is not assaulted a second time.
Thank you for sharing your story, Christine. I sincerely pray that a time of peace is coming to your family soon. I hope you’ll comment here at Vegan Reader again.
Mim
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